My grandfather: “So I hear you’re dating a black guy.”
I knew this would come up sooner or later. You would think my family would be used to my taste in men by now though. I have never been attracted to the clean-cut choir boy type, much to their dismay. Instead I am undeniably attracted to the bad boys.
When I was younger my taste was for the goth boys, the tall, dark, and skinny boys who wore lots of black, chains, and nail polish. Extra credit if they also played in a band, and a definite shoe-in if they were the lead singer.
My tastes matured in college to a more mature version of the above; still tall, dark, and skinny, only now they were men, preferably who still played in bands but who ditched the chains and nail polish for a more polished look. Extra credit if they have tattoos and piercings.
Once I was properly single for the first time in my adult life my tastes changed to black men. I think this is partly due to my experiences with white men, which have not been all that favourable (aside: I can hear a black guy I knew once saying that he can’t date black girls because they remind him of his sister). Black men, in my experience, are undeniably masculine, and that is what I want (need?) at this point in my life. I want a man who is a man, who knows he’s a man and who doesn’t deviate from that.
Of course, given my preference for the bad boy type, the inclination towards black men is probably also due to the fact that interracial dating is still considered taboo to many and so what better way to buck the system now that I’ve already brought home the tattooed and pierced goth boys?
I hope this in no way trivializes my attraction to / affection for / love of black men – it’s just an observation on my part.
The ironic thing though is that A is literally the most clean-cut man I’ve dated, ever. Maybe I’ve actually found the best of both worlds?
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