I don’t know how people survived long distance relationships before without the multitude of technology at their fingertips.
Today A is sending me paint colours to help him pick a colour for his bathroom. Of course I’ve never seen his bathroom in person but I have seen the tour of his house on Skype AND the new tiling he did in images and video so I wouldn’t be blindly helping him pick a colour.
Yesterday he drove to Kingston with a friend, and sent the below images along the way:
Obviously it’s not the same as being there, but every little bit helps to stay connected.
Long distance is hard. It’s much harder than I thought it would be. I am glad for technology and the ability to keep in touch with A throughout the day. I often send him the most mundane things – images, videos – over WhatsApp. He has seen so many images of my dogs, my clothes, things I’ve bought, food I’ve made. I’m just trying to keep him “in the loop,” so to speak.
The one thing that has been good though is that I have no trust issues with this man. There are no alarm bells, or anything that would even suggest there’s something else going on down in Jamaica than what I’ve been told. When I call him, I reach him, every time. If he’s with people he will still talk to me, and on video no less. And when he’s out with friends he will often hop on the free wifi and call me via Skype to talk. A man with something to hide would not behave this way – I should know, I’ve been with enough men who had something to hide!
Regardless, the distance is hard. There’s a lot to be said for being able to just touch someone. It’s also expensive to call the Caribbean, and sometimes Skype is not an option. I’m scared to see my upcoming phone bill actually – the first week he was gone we blew through 600 minutes of airtime, and that doesn’t factor in the time spent talking over wifi. At $0.25/minute that can really add up.
It’s all worth it though….and only 44 more days to go before I’m in Jamaica!
After hearing A’s voice yesterday sounding so not like him I went home and got started on the care package. I decided to make chocolate chip shortbread cookies since I figured they would hold up better in transit (they are delicious, by the way).
These smelled amazing when they were baking.
And they tasted even better.
I packed the cookies carefully in this tupperware container with a shitload of waxed paper to hold everything in place. I didn’t want the cookies to be tossed around and arrive crumbled, that would be such a waste. I finished it off with a bow, just because I’m awesome like that.
I also included the “pantygram” – panties picked up from the grocery store (gotta love Loblaws, where I can pick up panties, milk, and nail polish at the same time).
Actually I picked the card up there too and I thought it was pretty fitting – the inside says:
“What the hell is up with this?
I included a personal message but since it’s personal I won’t share it here. Oh, and the fabric envelope came from work because we have a million of these types of things around, which is going to make it really easy for me to nicely package the other things I want to send him….
The silver lining about this different country thing we have going on is that it gives me the opportunity to be super crafty. I have ideas, so many ideas, for things to make and send him. I can barely contain myself!
After being literally exhausted yesterday I passed out early and actually slept a straight 8 hours through the night. I felt amazing when I woke up, but A called me before work and seems to be really missing us (I think by “us” he means me and the dogs because he really bonded with Molly – see below!) and that made me sad.
I’m planning on sending him a care package tomorrow filled with homemade cookies and my own pantygram (new panties, not worn!) and this morning I sent this image to him to cheer him up:
To which he replied:
At least our sense of humour is still intact!
The cold has settled into my bones it seems. Not great timing – after dropping A off at the airport this morning I went home and got into bed to try and get another few minutes of sleep. I was so cold, even fully clothed. It was like my bed was chastising me for laying in it alone after having another human being in it for 7 nights straight. There was no warm body to steal heat from and I might resort to having the dogs sleep on the bed again so I can stay warm at night.
It was a good weekend, though bittersweet. It didn’t really hit me until last night that he was leaving and I started tearing up during sex. Really now, could my eyes not have waited until after sex to leak?
– It snowed! I was really hoping for the first snow while he was still here. There’s just something romantic about those first few flurries, especially when you’re huddled in a warm bed together.
– I took a detour offroad Saturday just for fun. His reaction to almost getting stuck in a mud pit was pretty funny. Apparently offroading/mudding is strictly a white person thing – but he admitted after he calmed down that he had fun.
Now I guess the countdown begins to when I fly out to visit him – 63 days!
The very last weekend with A is about to begin – come Monday morning he will be on a plane back home, where I won’t see him until January 28th.
I am keeping positive though by making plans to keep busy dancing and sleeping more. I’ll be starting to take classes starting next week – Bellydance, Urban Bellydance, and Dancehall – for fun and for exercise and to hopefully compensate for the lack of sex I’ll be having in the coming months. Sex though has been the reason I’ve barely slept this week. I’ve been going to bed at the usual time but being woken up at 2:30/3am to A groping me. I’m not complaining though, I’d rather have sex and no sleep than no sex at all given the upcoming circumstances.
I think I’ll really miss him though, and for more than just the sex.
Quite literally I am dead tired. A has been staying over every night this week, and will continue to until Sunday night. I am getting in as much time with him as possible before he leaves, but this means that I am also getting up at 4am to drive him back to his place to get ready for work, then going back home to sleep for another hour before I have to get up again. Even multiple doses of coffee are not doing enough this morning to keep me awake and focused, and I think today will be a write-off work-wise. I would love nothing more than to head home for a couple hours and nap!
I’ve decided to spend the time apart being productive rather than moping around, and have found a dance studio close by that has drop-in classes. I’m super excited to start dancing again – it’s fun and I always feel amazing after – not just because of the endorphins from the workout but I have better body image when I dance consistently, and who doesn’t want to just naturally feel better about themselves?